I Went For a Walk

It was a beautiful day – the sun was shining, the air fresh.

I went for a walk along the inlet, across the muddy flats of low tide.

As I wandered across bridges, up rough staircases and through the forests, I listened to the birds. And I breathed… Deep, cleansing breaths that reach down into my heart and clear away the tightness and fears.

I remember being in Grade 2 and I don’t know who thought of this or why, they had us lie flat on our backs in the primary school gym. I remember looking at the basketball hoops and thinking “those are so high!!” They had us close our eyes and a woman talked us through what I now know were relaxation exercises. Her voice was quiet and calm. I remember she told us to tighten up the muscles in each part of our body, then release – first our feet, then our legs, then our stomach, our arms, our hands, our face. I don’t remember feeling silly. I suppose I figured if my eyes were closed, then everyone else’s must be as well – so there was nothing to be embarrassed about. I remember being amazed at how loose and relaxed my muscles felt after I released – because I hadn’t even realized how I was holding my muscles tight in places, like my stomach or the back of my neck.

I think about this now because I still do that – hold those muscles tight when I worry. And as I walk and breathe, I mentally look at or check those muscles and consciously release them. And I remind myself to let the accompanying stress and fear go as well.

What forsight that teacher had to teach seven year olds how to relax! Here I am, more than thirty years later, still using this skill. Not sure I remember anything else so vividly from that time – except maybe the weekly music/singing times in the library with Mr. Storwick. I still sing those songs with my own second grader…

I walked on, thinking about my children and said a silent prayer of gratitude for having them in my life. I’m so blessed to have their lives and mine so intertwined – their love is a miracle every day. And I learn so much from them! I thought about how this world would really benefit from the lessons that our children can teach us – if only we could get past thinking that we adults are supposed to teach them all the time!! They teach me lessons about presence, openness, passion, creativity, acceptance, joy.

I walked a little further than I usually do and passed a bench – it sat in a sunny spot with an expansive view of the ocean, the mountains, some fluffy white clouds lazily drifting on the horizon. I remember thinking “what a peaceful little spot.” But I didn’t stop – because, after all, I was here to walk not sit!

And then I caught myself! What a stupid reason not to stop on this beautiful day!

I went back and noticed a dedication plaque on this bench:

Joan Spira 1928 – 2003

A passionate learner and teacher, loving wife, mom and grandma. She was a tireless worker for a moral world and a guardian of the environment. Rest here and give thought to making the world a better place and Joan’s lifelong kindness and vigelance will live on.

How amazing! How inspiring! And how happy I would be to have such an inscription written for me someday!

I sat and breathed some more, thinking about how to make the world a better place and knowing that I already have – by starting with myself.